Fantasy Nihilism: Volume 1 – “The proof of the pudding is in the eating.”

Posted on October 2, 2012 by

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Depending on how well you draft, how well your players perform, and how much luck you get on any given week, fantasy football can either be an exercise of glorious fun, or it can be the fucking demon sent to suck every ounce of joy out of your ever-decaying body until you are left to rot away the rest of your days in a puddle of tears and disappointment. It’s either the best or the worst. If you feel this season is more of the former, this post is not meant for you. If you find yourself consciously or subconsciously muttering “I hate fantasy”, “fuck fantasy”, or “fantasy is the worst” this post is for you!

Warning: What follows is not meant to and will, in fact, not make you feel better.  You will feel worse, but once you realize there is no hope you may be able to let it all go.Let’s start with a letter from a fan.

Where does the phrase “the proof is in the pudding” come from? Heather – San Bruno, California

Dear Heather:

Kind of a random question for a fantasy football league, don’t you think?  That being said, not talking about fantasy football for a while may be good for me.  After a little research, here is what I found.  Perhaps it’s a sign of our increasingly fast-paced, short-attention-span society that even our old proverbs are being shortened and clipped down from the original full sayings. Word Detective and other etymology sites pointed out that the phrase originated as “the proof of the pudding is in the eating.” The phrase dates back to at least 1615 when Miguel de Cervantes published Don Quixote. It means that the true value or quality of something can only be judged when it’s put to use. The meaning is often summed up as “results are what count.”

Oh. I see what you did there, Heather. “Results are what count.”  So what if you are one of the poor chaps not getting results?  I hate to say it, but things do not look good.

I did a little statistical analysis of previous seasons. Since the league started in 2007, 18 teams have stared 1-3 or 0-4. Of those 18 teams, 4 (22%) have made the playoffs.  22% doesn’t seem that bad – especially considering two teams made it to the semi’s and one team lost in the Championship game.  However, since the TCFFL moved from an 8-team playoff to a 6-team playoff in 2009, no team starting 1-3 or worse has ever made the playoffs, and no team has finished above .500.

Woof. No hope.

The  other side.  We here at Fantasy Nihilism understand that there is always the other side of the story.  In this case, one could point out that six teams have started 2-2 meaning that Pacific Island Boys, Ronald Weasels, and Weekend at Bernie’s are not out of it at this point.  A win streak here and a win streak there and those teams are right back in it.  That is until Heather writes to thank us and remind us that “the proof of the pudding is in the eating.” Fuck Heather. Fuck hope.  And fuck fantasy football.

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